one must do one’s best to educate the younger generation…

After my triumph in the restaurant the other evening, I felt very splendid indeed. Yesterday I realized that I needed some assistance in reading and editing some scripts. As I felt like a stroll, I called young Crispin and said “I need you to cast your professional eye over some scripts young chap. May I stroll on over?”

Crispin was agreeable, so I took a ten-minute stroll to his residence. However, upon entering I heard the most god-awful racket coming from his study. I carefully approached and entered the room; Crispin was sitting at his desk and the cacophony appeared to be coming from his stereo equipment.

“Crispin!”, I shouted, “What in all of heaven and earth is that dreadful noise?”

He looked up at me and said “Just music Nigel. It is by an American band called ‘Kinski‘. I quite like them.”

At this point I had heard just about enough. I strode over to the stereo equipment, and with a huge sweep of my arm knocked it crashing to the floor. I then started kicking and stamping on the equipment.”

“There!” I announced. “You will not need to listen to that cacophony any more! I will arrange for a man to come and deliver you a radio so that you can listen to classical music on Radio 3. So much better for the concentration, and more befitting for such gentlemen of culture as ourselves. Please do not thank me Crispin. As always, you know it is for your own good.”

Crispin sat at his desk looking stunned, started crying, and said softly “Sometimes I really hate you Nigel.”

“I know Crispin, I know,” I replied, “but everything I do is for your own good. If only you could realize it.”